Everyone knows the fairy tale version of Little Red Riding Hood right?
Well... I call my version "Lil' Red's in the Hood" which begs the next question "Who is Red?" She's the little girl who went skipping through the forest to her Grandmother's house for a visit and met a nasty wolf instead... really? Of course, I run to my Grandmother's house quite often but I meet up with some very friendly wolves... Maybe one day you'll meet them too! Once upon a time I lived with, slept with, ran with and ate with a very large wolf named Phoenix. True story. We'd go for long hikes together and I would talk to Phoenix... the Faeries... Devas and Nature Spirits while we explored the trails. They would answer. So- "Red" is the name I speak when I call upon the Overliting Deva of Wolves. It makes the communication between us easier because we have a name to use as a point of reference. |
Whenever I see a Hummingbird, a mighty, tiny harbinger of women's warrior medicine, it means that Red has chosen that little bird's shape to flit across my vision
and grab my attention. He-she often sends a message another way by throwing of a ball of red light that flashes across my inner vision the way a baseball flies across the field. There. You see, Lil' Red can be tough and she lives in my hood and I, in her neck of the woods. These days Phoenix and the Spirit Wolves in my pack: Druid, Hopi, Lucas and Akasha speak to me in my dreams, visions and of course when I sit down at the computer to write for them. Sometimes they visit
lucky people who come to our WolfWalking - Shamanic Journey Circles. This is our Blog. We love to share our stories so grab a seat.
* Red and my Pack have another story to tell...
and grab my attention. He-she often sends a message another way by throwing of a ball of red light that flashes across my inner vision the way a baseball flies across the field. There. You see, Lil' Red can be tough and she lives in my hood and I, in her neck of the woods. These days Phoenix and the Spirit Wolves in my pack: Druid, Hopi, Lucas and Akasha speak to me in my dreams, visions and of course when I sit down at the computer to write for them. Sometimes they visit
lucky people who come to our WolfWalking - Shamanic Journey Circles. This is our Blog. We love to share our stories so grab a seat.
* Red and my Pack have another story to tell...
"WindRunner" ~ One of our Tails from the Wolf Pack
* |
* From my Journey
with Akasha |
Here are two poems I wish to share:
As I walk with Wolf, I step firmly into heart-centered consciousness.
How fragile the dream... how thin be the mists... how selfish the heart... can my soul be as strong as that of the wolf? Sometimes I know it is so. |
# 1 All around, things were cast in disarray. I could barely manage to stay. I felt the darkness descend like rain. My spirit was in so much pain... I drifted off to sleep... A white wolf whispered, "do not weep". Midst the shadows of the night, She-wolf came to share with me, her magical flight. Though the moon was dim and out of sight, My life, my dream now bright Was once again bathed in light. Embraced by feathery wings, I felt safe, put right. |
Do wolves really have wings?
Obviously not... but they most certainly have been known to bring divine inspiration or act as angelic messengers at times. When I am with wolf,
my spirit takes flight. This white Wolf Spirit soars toward the stars, keeping watch, ready to guide me with the knowledge of ancient wisdom.
She remains by my side in spirit, everywhere I go.
Obviously not... but they most certainly have been known to bring divine inspiration or act as angelic messengers at times. When I am with wolf,
my spirit takes flight. This white Wolf Spirit soars toward the stars, keeping watch, ready to guide me with the knowledge of ancient wisdom.
She remains by my side in spirit, everywhere I go.
*** |
"Angel Wolf"
This evening I sit outside under the dark sky and stare at the stars. I know you see the same stars too. I feel you so near to me. Do you hear the whispers of my wolf spirit? Will you answer my call? As the wind gently ruffles my hair, I feel your touch and how you care. Our paths have crossed in strange ways, A bonding so tight that it grows stronger each day. What is this love that we feel, A dream, or is it real? So real it brings joy to our souls, A wonderful future with beautiful goals. As you head further out of sight And I get ready to switch off the light, My prayer for you is to be safe on your flight. Until we meet in your tomorrow My angel, good night. ♥♥ |
"Finding a way Out"
"For so long I felt like a colossal failure"... these are the words I heard upon waking this morning and I saw the image of the wolf with wings to go with the statement. At first it seemed like a contradiction for I didn't think the words fit the picture but they do. They applied to my life up to a point... I struggled to pull myself out of a crazy-making, debilitating depression.
Yah, it was there. Hidden from public view cause I'm so good at sliding into it and tired of hiding it, even from myself. The feelings have been around so long that they felt like a second skin. An all too familiar skin that really isn't comfortable anymore. Hence the struggle to take it off, to pull myself up and out of it but sometimes it didn't seem as though I'd be able to manage it. I couldn't really get rid of it and I didn't want to... sometimes.
Before anyone disagrees with that statement, take a look at it from a different point of view - Every dark cloud has a silver lining and you can't get rid of your shadow... unless you stand in the light. But then it's not really gone, is it? You just can't see it temporarily. Shadows give light definition.
Look at the wolf in the picture above and describe the image to yourself... did you think about it for a moment?
Here is what I described to myself:
The wolf is white, light. She has wings. Wings enable her to fly and lift themselves higher, up out of darkness into the light. Yes, silly I know but white wolves are automatically female in my mind. When I see or think of white wings, I think of Angels or Celestial messengers too.
My wolf companion taught me to rise to the occasion, to stand up to my demons, to face my fears and calmly demand that "they" back down, not I. The same goes for my depression. I've chosen to stand in it and face it, to see what it has to offer me. How do I make it my ally? How do I reshape it from being a weakness into becoming a strength?
When it rears it's ugly head, I look at the words I use to describe my depressed states; I "battle" it, I "fight" it or I retreat and "hide" behind it. My son once described it back to me. "I see you sitting on some comfortable red pillows in a pit of darkness - you're in an uncomfortable comfort zone". It's not very comfortable any more because now that I've seen it truly, I know that I can transform it into something different. I finally did just that.
At first the struggle was just about survival, trying to keep my head from going under completely. I had a Soul Retrieval done many years ago and since then puzzle pieces have fallen into place where I can make sense of them. Now I recognize how and when I'm hiding from the world. I recognize when I'm mentally sitting on my red pillows. I actually made a red velvet pillow to remind me to "sit" in my center and anchor myself in a place of self-empowerment. I've practiced monitoring my mood swings in order to follow my descent into the darkness of my despair so that I am able to map my way back out. This has been a huge challenge. I wish I could just snap my fingers and make it go away. I tried. It didn't happen. Like the winged wolf in the picture, it has been a climb upwards. Mine has been slow and determined. Practice, practice, practice. In my case, repetition is the key that opens the doors of change. As many times as I fall back in, I'll climb out again. The time will come when I know without a shadow of a doubt that I can support myself just by choosing to lift myself up. This begs the question "what lifts me up?" or to rephrase it "what gives me a lift?"
Exercise, taking flower essences... eating chocolate, yum :) The list is longer but those are the most immediate responses. I used to dread the very thought of running but out of sheer necessity, I made a commitment to my wolf and ran with her on a daily basis. She was extremely high maintenance in terms of exercise, since wolves are long distance runners in the wild. When we ran together we bonded, we became a true pack. We'd both go into a light trance state. I loved to see the look on her face, the sway of her relaxed shoulders and her ears laid back softly. The sound of her nails hitting the pavement, kept time with the 1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4 beat of my running shoes. (I'd count). I knew we were "in the zone" together. Move the mind out of the way and the body takes over. Our pace was steady and cyclical. Our heartbeats, our breathing and our footsteps all became synchronized. We two became one.
While my body was occupied, I could hear the Spirits talking to me, sometimes cheering me on as I pushed the limits of my endurance to take another twenty steps. As I pushed, I visualized the completion of a project that I was working on at home. Each time I passed a goal point ahead, I felt an elated sense of accomplishment and a profound sense of victory. I'd do a few steps of the happy dance with my arms extended above my head to celebrate. My body, my mind and my spirit had all risen to the occasion with my wolf beside me. The projects I had visualized as finished on my run were easily completed later at home.
I've come full circle as to why I'm writing this particular blog article in the first place...
How can tell myself that I feel like a failure when I've found a way to see, feel and know victory in every fiber of my being?
The writing, like the photo is black and white, on the wall, on the page in plain sight and I can't hide from the truth of it any longer. Thinking that I'm a failure doesn't serve me at all! Having visualized the completion or outcome of a goal anchored that feeling of success in my cellular body memory especially because I ran past the point of victory. I love experiencing the thrill of victory! This is one of my personal ways out of depression.
These days I choose to run because it's my way of healing myself, my way of keeping my eye on the prize. I miss my companion's physical presence but I sense the strength of her spirit running beside me. So, the more consistently I run and visualize the completion of my projects, the more successful I feel and the more goals I actually achieve. Hurrah for me!
"For so long I felt like a colossal failure"... these are the words I heard upon waking this morning and I saw the image of the wolf with wings to go with the statement. At first it seemed like a contradiction for I didn't think the words fit the picture but they do. They applied to my life up to a point... I struggled to pull myself out of a crazy-making, debilitating depression.
Yah, it was there. Hidden from public view cause I'm so good at sliding into it and tired of hiding it, even from myself. The feelings have been around so long that they felt like a second skin. An all too familiar skin that really isn't comfortable anymore. Hence the struggle to take it off, to pull myself up and out of it but sometimes it didn't seem as though I'd be able to manage it. I couldn't really get rid of it and I didn't want to... sometimes.
Before anyone disagrees with that statement, take a look at it from a different point of view - Every dark cloud has a silver lining and you can't get rid of your shadow... unless you stand in the light. But then it's not really gone, is it? You just can't see it temporarily. Shadows give light definition.
Look at the wolf in the picture above and describe the image to yourself... did you think about it for a moment?
Here is what I described to myself:
The wolf is white, light. She has wings. Wings enable her to fly and lift themselves higher, up out of darkness into the light. Yes, silly I know but white wolves are automatically female in my mind. When I see or think of white wings, I think of Angels or Celestial messengers too.
My wolf companion taught me to rise to the occasion, to stand up to my demons, to face my fears and calmly demand that "they" back down, not I. The same goes for my depression. I've chosen to stand in it and face it, to see what it has to offer me. How do I make it my ally? How do I reshape it from being a weakness into becoming a strength?
When it rears it's ugly head, I look at the words I use to describe my depressed states; I "battle" it, I "fight" it or I retreat and "hide" behind it. My son once described it back to me. "I see you sitting on some comfortable red pillows in a pit of darkness - you're in an uncomfortable comfort zone". It's not very comfortable any more because now that I've seen it truly, I know that I can transform it into something different. I finally did just that.
At first the struggle was just about survival, trying to keep my head from going under completely. I had a Soul Retrieval done many years ago and since then puzzle pieces have fallen into place where I can make sense of them. Now I recognize how and when I'm hiding from the world. I recognize when I'm mentally sitting on my red pillows. I actually made a red velvet pillow to remind me to "sit" in my center and anchor myself in a place of self-empowerment. I've practiced monitoring my mood swings in order to follow my descent into the darkness of my despair so that I am able to map my way back out. This has been a huge challenge. I wish I could just snap my fingers and make it go away. I tried. It didn't happen. Like the winged wolf in the picture, it has been a climb upwards. Mine has been slow and determined. Practice, practice, practice. In my case, repetition is the key that opens the doors of change. As many times as I fall back in, I'll climb out again. The time will come when I know without a shadow of a doubt that I can support myself just by choosing to lift myself up. This begs the question "what lifts me up?" or to rephrase it "what gives me a lift?"
Exercise, taking flower essences... eating chocolate, yum :) The list is longer but those are the most immediate responses. I used to dread the very thought of running but out of sheer necessity, I made a commitment to my wolf and ran with her on a daily basis. She was extremely high maintenance in terms of exercise, since wolves are long distance runners in the wild. When we ran together we bonded, we became a true pack. We'd both go into a light trance state. I loved to see the look on her face, the sway of her relaxed shoulders and her ears laid back softly. The sound of her nails hitting the pavement, kept time with the 1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4 beat of my running shoes. (I'd count). I knew we were "in the zone" together. Move the mind out of the way and the body takes over. Our pace was steady and cyclical. Our heartbeats, our breathing and our footsteps all became synchronized. We two became one.
While my body was occupied, I could hear the Spirits talking to me, sometimes cheering me on as I pushed the limits of my endurance to take another twenty steps. As I pushed, I visualized the completion of a project that I was working on at home. Each time I passed a goal point ahead, I felt an elated sense of accomplishment and a profound sense of victory. I'd do a few steps of the happy dance with my arms extended above my head to celebrate. My body, my mind and my spirit had all risen to the occasion with my wolf beside me. The projects I had visualized as finished on my run were easily completed later at home.
I've come full circle as to why I'm writing this particular blog article in the first place...
How can tell myself that I feel like a failure when I've found a way to see, feel and know victory in every fiber of my being?
The writing, like the photo is black and white, on the wall, on the page in plain sight and I can't hide from the truth of it any longer. Thinking that I'm a failure doesn't serve me at all! Having visualized the completion or outcome of a goal anchored that feeling of success in my cellular body memory especially because I ran past the point of victory. I love experiencing the thrill of victory! This is one of my personal ways out of depression.
These days I choose to run because it's my way of healing myself, my way of keeping my eye on the prize. I miss my companion's physical presence but I sense the strength of her spirit running beside me. So, the more consistently I run and visualize the completion of my projects, the more successful I feel and the more goals I actually achieve. Hurrah for me!